hahaha in usual 04s63 fashion, meeting at 530 means earliest 6...so here i am, at 530..still at home! i was gonna leave 15mins ago but they said they'll all be late. at 5 i saw marcus logon to msn. so no rush haha. i have no idea what we're gonna do here..but its ok im sure we can conjure up some rubbish knowing all of them.
this year's xmas cake turned out alot better than usual...no burnt bits, not dry, cake didnt even attempt to stick to the pan...the secret must be not caring about it when yr baking...because the one year i bake for the sake of baking it it turns out better than normal...
according to terence i will have fun the next two years doing jack all..oh well might as well use up my quota of stoning for the rest of my life and hopefully do something productive after ns...or even during cuz im sure i'll use more than my fair share.
i miss you..the pain has eased a little...my chest no longer tightens up to suffocate me..but the great sense of loss is everpresent..i'm sorry i yelled at you, i just had to make it known that i'm not the useless aimless goalless drifter i might appear to be. i don't know where you get the idea that i think you are any less hurt than i am, because its definately not from me. take care, i'll just be here watching, as i knew i would be doing from the very beginning. thank you for your time, i'd want more of it, but im just selfish...
smile-
all i ever wanted for Christmas was you.